Monthly Archives: August 2015

Blog – Sex Around Menopause 8/26/2015

Sex Around Menopause

August 26th, 2015

The article was initially going to be called “Sex After Menopause” but it’s so multifaceted I changed it. I always thought it was just a cruel taunt to tell women that their vaginas would dry up and shrivel away but it’s somewhat true. The decrease in estrogen also comes with depreciated  blood flow to the vaginal area. The walls of the vagina also become thinner. But before young ladies get too bummed out over this they should know the “shrivel away” portion of the taunt is optional. It turns out that “use it or loose it’ stands true with menopause. Sex increases the blood flow and promotes vaginal health.

Perimenopause somewhere around the age of 40 is marked by missing some menstruation cycles. When you miss 12 consecutive periods your in menopause. For a very small percentage of women this doesn’t happen until about 60. For the rest of you it will happen between 40 and 50. Smokers tend to experience it younger. A woman can still get pregenant during perimenopause unlike menopause.  Perimenopause is the gradual precursor to menopause. Thank God it doesn’t happen overnight. The ovaries start to produce fewer and fewer eggs. There is also a decrease in collagen. Collagen gives your skin that plump fleshy look. Along with that decrease your skin loses elasticity. You may get facial hair and believe or not acne. Your cognition may become more dull and dry skin to boot.

There’s a lot to get depressed about but many things in the extensive list above can be treated. Even painful sex can be easily avoided by using a water soluble lubricant. If you don’t have partner for sex masturbation can get the same desired result. Here’s what the folks at WebMD had to say about it. “Make more time for sex. Try massage and other acts short of intercourse. Use erotica and new-for-you sex routines as ways to build desire, too. Other causes besides hormone changes can strike at the same time. Ask a doctor about poor sleep, bladder trouble, or feeling depressed or stressed”. 8 Reasons Sex Is Better After 50 is an article about keeping the desire alive after 50. I really hope this is the case

There are a number of medical procedures that can bring on Menopause. Those include surgical removal of the ovaries (bilateral oopharectomy), chemotherapy, and pelvic radiation therapy. Having a hysterectomy (surgical removal of the uterus) without removing the ovaries does not lead to menopause. Two of the greatest dangers to menopausal women is osteoporosis and heart disease (heart disease is the number one killer of women in the U.S).

This is the first time I’ve ever heard of “Bioidentical hormone therapy” for menopausal symptoms. It can refer to certain FDA-approved prescription drugs or it can refer to custom-compounded hormones derived from plants prepared at compounding pharmacies to match each unique patient. Some doctors claim that compounded bioidentical hormones are safer, but the FDA isn’t convinced. The FDA’s advice — take the lowest dose for the shortest time — applies to bioidentical hormone therapy. Custom-compounded bioidentical hormones aren’t FDA approved”. How could they be each one is different. So even though it doesn’t have FDA approval doesn’t necessarily mean it’s dangerous. There is however the danger of cancer with hormone replacement therapy.

I think it’s fitting to end this article with love. Most women’s sex drives are negotiated by emotional attachment; at least in part. Think the older I get the more I share that characteristic. My woman (in her 40’s) is every bit as physically attractive to me as Beyonce’, Jennifer Lopez, or Michelle Pfeiffer and unlike these other women I love her. Hopefully I can compare with Sylvester Stallone and Vin Diesel in her heart. If so, these enchantments will take us all the way through menopause. Until next week; keep your homes well.

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Blog – Men, Women And The Wage Gap 8/19/2015

Men, Women And The Wage Gap

August 19th, 2015

I logged onto a website belonging to National Women’s Legal Center (NWLC) and was stunned by how unfairly women are treated in the workplace. The site was difficult to navigate but what the hell “Overall women only receive 77 or 78 cents for every dollar that their white non-Hispanic counterpart receives”. How could the courts uphold such blatant oppression? I read through the over 100 pages not including the fact sheets and the 77 or 78 cent figure headed most of them. Then I turned to Google to see if I could find someone who made less of the gap. There was a very articulate but cocky and disagreeable writer named Matthew Cochran who insisted “There Is No Wage Gap: Feminists Want Equal Pay For Unequal Work“. So I read on.  Then one piece of information struck me. “For women who are never married, that 77 cents on the dollar rises to 96 cents”. It was similar to something I read on the NWLC’s site somewhere around page 69. (Begin Excerpt) “Numerous studies show that even when all relevant career and family attributes are taken into account, there is still a significant, unexplained gap in men’s and women’s earnings. Thus, even when women make the same career choices as men and work the same hours, they earn less. For example, a study of college graduates one year after graduation determined that women earned only 95 percent of what men earned, even after accounting for variables such as “job and workplace, employment experience and continuity, education and training, and demographic and personal characteristics”. (End Excerpt) Matthew’s assertion  that never getting married is equal is ridiculous and the NWLC’s definition for equal work not including hours worked is ridiculous as well.

A 5 cent gap on the dollar isn’t fair. Still it’s not a 23 cent gap. Any gap in equal pay should be addressed.

Both would be making better evaluations if they understood Occupational Parenting. My question to Matthew is why is raising children less valuable work than investment brokering? Some would say that’s just capitalism. Occupational Parenting depends on capitalism to get the best information possible here in our information age. Investments are not as important as raising our young nor is it as important as many other social services jobs. We are a people who’s priorities are really out of harmony with existence itself. Both men and women should be putting more value on the home no matter which one is doing the work. Everything else would just fall into place. Until next week; keep your homes well.

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Blog – Subliminalized 8/12/2015


August 12th, 2015

division bell(be sure to click)  Subliminalized. Nope; not even a word. I just made it up but Adrenalized comes to mind when I say it. It’s recognizable as an album title for Def Leopard fans. I don’t even know if I should be using the word album; cd maybe. I had the cassette tape and if memory serves me correctly my ex-wife and I used to listen to it everyday when she got home from school. There’s all kinds of signs and symbols on it, like a dollar bill. (I’m sorry it was Hysteria). You may enjoy Word Play. Anyway like Pink Floyd’s “The Division Bell” CD I assumed that we were all a bunch of metal heads with targets in our eyes for whatever the next subliminal sharpshooter had in mind.

subliminalized hysteriaThe Supreme Court’s reasoning not to uphold subliminal messaging should apply in all cases not just advertising. Below is an excerpt from The Legal Status of Subliminal Communication in America

(begin excerpt) The Court concludes that the foregoing cases firmly establish that the privacy rights of an unwilling listener will prevail over the free speech rights of a speaker if the listener is subjected to a speaker’s message under circumstances which make it impossible or impractical for the listener to avoid being exposed to the unwanted message. Conversely, if the listener or viewer can avoid exposure after the initial impact, then the First Amendment rights of the speaker should prevail. (end excerpt)

We’re also not supposed to talk on our cell phones while driving, or smoke marijuana, or even spit on the sidewalk. These laws are broken on the daily and I figure why would subliminal messaging be any different. It’s not like murder and some experts say one could not be forced to commit murder (though subliminal messaging) if it was not the desire of the individual initially. I want readers to pick out a hint of sarcasm in that last sentence. Subliminal Stimuli comes with an acceptably complete definition and reiterates what some experts have said under “Effectiveness”. Some followers Advertising claim there is no validity to the power of suggestion through subliminal messaging and tie failing of James Vicary to the failing of the notion. I believe it’s throwing out the baby with the bath water. The famed “popcorn experiment” never happened but folks have seen other examples of subliminal stimuli at work “Do Subliminal Messages Work“. This claims only one type of subliminal messaging works but they contradict themselves because they claim the subconscious mind can’t hear anything the conscious mind can’t hear. The mind has the capability to hear though the background of the ocean sounds. As the mind evolves (I do believe it does) who’s to say that tomorrow’s mind can’t slow down a repeated phrase or that some minds can’t do it today.

subliminalized babyFor me the whole thing gets a little scary when I think of young developing minds. Just the fact that a growing mind is exposed to subliminal tasks, attitudes or perception may mean they’re more resistant to it when they get older but what if they’re more vulnerable to it later in life. If their little developing intuitions never feel threatened by it why would they develop any defenses to it? I’ll end this blog like last week’s blog, “I’m glad this America where the people (especially parents) have the right to oversee the overseers. Until next week; keep your homes well.

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Blog – How Does Music Effect Today’s Youths? 8/5/2015

How Does Music Effect Today’s Youths?

August 5th, 2015

Thank you Yolanda Gibson for the suggestion.

I knew this would be a tall order to fill because of indirect correlation. Two things may be true but one doesn’t necessarily cause the other. An example would be that people wear bathing suits more often in the summer. People also eat more ice cream in the summer. That doesn’t mean that people eat ice cream because they’re wearing a bathing suit or that people wear bathing suits because they’re eating ice cream. A direct correlation could probably be made with the increase in temperature for both. So direct correlation is more cause and effect. i.e. This music made her get pregnant or that music made him commit murder. It’s really hard to say cause and effect.

We’ll get started with early youth. “Benefits of Music in Child Development” is not a research based article. It’s really warm and fuzzy; inspired much like youth itself. These are the “Mary had a Little Lamb” days. No-one would be able to deny their infants and toddlers the developmental emotional rewards that come with music training. Music training? As simple as singing or humming to your children and having them join in as time allots. “The Effect of Early Music Training on Child Cognitive Development” is research based and claims that musical training can enhance your child’s  thinking ability. (for the research based articles you may want to skip to the conclusion portion unless your interested in the methodology or other aspects)  “The Effect of Early Music Training on Child Cognitive Development” (2) is the same name; different article. It’s very short and from what I read it says early music training can actually add mass to the developing brain in the form of gray matter.

A child arrives at a slightly rebellious attitude and it’s ok for lyrics to degrade what was formally a flawless hero. (The Barney song) or ( jingle bells, Batman smells) I think my daughter did it to show her peers that she wasn’t a baby.  So time progresses and the child’s taste in music becomes more sophisticated until they’re in their teens. These days are far from “Mary had a Little Lamb.

Sex and music: As of 2013 the teen pregnancy (15-19 years old) rate had declined over the previous 20 years. “Trends in Teen Pregnancy and Childbearing“. If one was to make a connection to music what would it be? Music seems to talk more and more about sex so wouldn’t the teen pregnancy rate increase do to this influence. I think we need to look at the bigger picture. While songs are tending to unabashedly make references to sex so is everyone else. Parents, teachers, and peers are speaking more directly about the woes of teenaged pregnancy and the danger of STD’s. With these undesirables being more speakable more condoms are being used. Lyrics today may challenge youths to think more about sex whether it be Katy Perry’s “menage a trois” or Tove Love’s “We f**k for life” or Kayne West’s “alien sex” back to Sinead O’connor’s “Put your hands on me” and George Michaels’s “I want your sex” it still demands thought. Today I think it’s a more thoughtful process in the spirit of songs like “Let’s talk about sex” from TLC.

Let’s get to violence. “Violent Music Lyrics Increase Aggressive Thoughts and Feelings, According to New Study”  states there is a cause and effect relationship between music and the precursors to violent behavior. “Thoughts and Feelings” are key for me. It’s not behavior. Like song lyrics that fall short of behavior maybe the actions of the groups studied would fall short as well. “Sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me”. Still I believe an influence is there in most everything we do. Like more talk about sex (and I’m not defending today’s music as appropriate) maybe we should engage in more talk about violence and finding suitable outlets for it. This should be on the immediate agenda. Talk about bullying has already reached the foreground maybe we need to go a step further. Degrading and Non-grading Sex in Popular Music is a link that speaks about violence and substance use as well as sex. It’s authors don’t make a direct correlation between music and these risky behaviors but they lead to the idea that early sexual intercourse and these other behaviors are linked to degrading sex music. That’s right earlier sexual intercourse with a decline in teen pregnancy.

I can’t consider “How Music Effects Today’s Youths” without considering subliminal messaging. It gained overwhelming validation then lost an overwhelming amount of credibility. Now it rest with some credibility and validation. There are still champions of the polar extremes in whether it works or not but most researchers have arrived at a point of moderation. I realized that there’s enough here for another blog and it’s one I will write soon. I will say that though the Supreme Court made subliminal advertising illegal it doesn’t mean that we are not being exposed to it everyday.  Here’s a scary thought. What if subliminal messaging entered into the “Mary had a Little Lamb” days. I don’t want anyone with any intention to reach into the subconscious mind of my 14 year old until she is old enough to try a self help recording for herself; if she chooses to do so. In your case it may be your first grader. Yes, I think the young can be effected. We should at least find out what can and can’t be done with subliminal messaging.

In conclusion, today’s music does effect youth but adequate parenting and schooling do as well. It is an American duty to oversee our overseers. Big business needs just as much questioning as Big Brother (The Government).  Until next week; keep your homes well.

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